Why you shouldn't mess with us fat people !

Its one of those months where things are moving at a snail's pace and the day finds me  peeling paint off my walls and tying my hair into knots . The latter activity was amusing till I couldn't untie one of the knots and had  my mother cut it off with a scissor  while hurling expletives my way . Then I figured its been a while since I ve entered a post in the "Vagina moanalogues " as  a friend once referred to my rant series . With a disturbing picture of a frowning vagina   and my hair looking like a cat bit off a chunk of it , I will now delve into details of whats teeing me off this time .

I've been fat all my life . I've heard my mother telling stories of  how I used to drink up bottles of milk and the calf of the milkman grew up to resent me . During my preschool days she used to be the object of envy of her friends . When fussy mothers used to lament that their children never ate their veggies or that they were considering protein supplements and Complan , my mother  beamed with pride and gloated on how  I asked for my three meals  ,polished off  everything that was served on my plate including half a rubber band and an ice cream spatula that wasn't , in addition to walking  around the house with the biggest bottle of milk I could muster up strength to hold along with a mini pillow that would be used to rest my head after drinking it up . 

Years passed and things haven't really changed . I love my milk despite of being lactose intolerant and the cows are happy that I'm not overdoing it for fear of spending the night hugging my loo . I  still finish everything on my plate . I cook what I want to eat, share my food  and I'm thoughtful enough to cook for others as well .I still take my pillow where ever I go and Im still fat . 

However the things that have changed is what bothers me . Lets start with my mother . Pride flew out of the window like Dhoni had helicopter shot it  and is now replaced with worry and embarrassment . Her friends ask her why I'm fat and she is often the object of ridicule as opposed to before . When I walk around with a juice bottle in my hand ,my father who once thought it was cute ,now asks me if its the sugar free version that I'm drinking . The peachy skin and chubby cheeks that were once termed adorable is now replaced with  words like obese and double chinned .

Now all that  , I can endure . I know. If you're going to call me a cow ,at least assume that I have the hide thickness of one .Anyway what literally ticks me off is the rudeness and the lack of etiquette with which it  is rubbed in my face . 

Where in the frigging corner  of the earth have the good mannered people fled to? Its like trying to locate Anne Frank during world war II and fruitless as trying to prove OJ Simpson's innocence  . Despite of all the things my parents say to me within the walls of my house  , I would ,even to this day be admonished ( I'm using a relatively harmless word instead of flogged to death ) if  they found out that I told someone on their face that they 're fat or ugly. 

Yes , I'm offended that someone called me fat . Before you think twice and go " But urmm you are .." , as I ve mentioned  innumerable times in this article , I'm very aware of this peculiar little fact . And it does bother me to an extent, but not enough to starve myself to death or tie myself to a treadmill . If I feel like it ,I eat what I like and if I want to, I 'll work out .But , the issue that just ticks me off is when people , think  they 're duty bound to read it out to me and inform  me that I resemble a beached whale .

Poking fun at fat people has been a source of entertainment to mankind since time immemorial . It varies from  the mildly insulting " Ha Ha You need two flight seats to fit  " to " Damn , I would 've hit that if she wasnt a fat whore " . 50 cent didn't exactly help the situation when he sang about "fat bitches " and asked to them to stay away if they re "300 pounds" . Fat jokes that circulate the internet are rated right at the top with those weird Rajni jokes  ,your momma jokes that are crass and blonde jokes that no one seems to get any way (Another rant in itself). We  get entertained with some "good" humoured insulting , groove to offensive music and get on with our lives . 

No one, not for a minute ,ever turns back to take a look at the poor overweight soul who nodded and giggled along to  all your boorish jokes . Not everyone takes it to heart I know . Me? Im like the bird who got pushed off a cliff . A fall is inevitable but you learn to fly anyway . Today  though , I'm speaking for every person on the heavier side  of the scales, for every girl who has sobbed into her pillows at night because an ass called her fat , for every guy who could never find a T shirt that fit him in the regular stores , for every patient with an endocrinological problem ,every girl who has PCOS , for every person who was pushed into bulimia and suicide ,and most importantly  every life form in the world that  got bullied for being fat . And I'm positive  they all agree unanimously  with me ,when I make it clear that the only thing we need of you to do is MIND YOUR OWN BLOODY DAMN BUSINESS. 

We all know admitting our weakness is akin to social suicide these days . Physical appearances dominate over intelligence ,personality , character and education . But if you prance around me and call me fat while you stink like an unkempt urinal  or ask me how hard it is for me to find tops in XXL size  when you look twice your age affected with marasmus , just dont expect me to shut up, be courteous  or not be offended.  I dont give 2 hoots what your reason is .If you want me to be healthy , fuck it!  Im 24 and did my undergraduate course in medicine . I know I might die while climbing up the stairs but its MY frigging choice . If you want me to be a stronger person ,prime my mind to  a higher level of confidence when people make fun of me,I'll have you know that I have a very intact backbone and perhaps more testicles than you.I dont need you to give me test doses and coach me or I'm going to have to teach you to be stronger as well when you end up having to live with an ugly face when I bash your teeth in .And lastly , I DO NOT need you to tell me the calorific value of everything that I eat in front of you . If I hear you tut tutting or tsking when I'm tucking into my cheesey bites or cream lasagnes I swear to God , wont think twice about head butting you and leaving you on a curb in Delhi where you'd get your brains raped out .

And God help you if I find you bullying any living being .. a human / a dog / a turtle for being overweight . 

If you genuinely care about the person in question , and you want them to lose weight for specific health reasons , take them to a physician who has the right to tell them they have to pull up their socks  and get sorted out . 

You can call this rant of mine an overreaction ,a dramatic response to perhaps a very infinitesimal remark from an  acquaintance of mine ,but to me it was the last strand of hay that broke the camel's back .

Because for every person who presumably is perfect in every way possible to judge others there is going to  be a shattered individual whom they pushed off the cliff .

For every rude remark made , there is a talented person who gets intimidated, remains  forever in a closet and perhaps take it to their grave .

For every snarky swipe made at  body fat , there is a young mind that contemplates suicide.

For every rejection of  acceptance, there is an individual being lured by Bulimia .

Things arent as hunky dory as they seem and while you revel in your comic timing , do take a moment to notice that you' ve doused the fire inside a heart ,though they may never ever  admit it to you  in their lives . 

And while you re at it take a good long hard look at yourself , know what and who you are before you consider yourself qualified  or of any substantial importance before you call foul on someone else's follies . 

Its not late yet . As my best friend once told me , to err is human , to admit you erred is superhuman .If you know you've been a prick to someone  especially on the basis of physical qualities ,race ,caste ,religion and belief , mend it asap as I keep reminding every time I write , karma is ruthless  and when she bitch slaps you on your face ,it might be just a tad too late .

Borrowing the words of Edwin Markham from his poem "A creed " ,I quote 

"

There is a destiny that makes us brothers: 
none goes his way alone,
All that we send into the lives of others ,
comes back into our own.


Dramatic yet defensively yours 


D 


PS : If anyone reading this post is being bullied or taunted  by an imbecile for being a plus sized individual , you may contact me and I will hunt the bugger down . Promise xx